When you can’t find a tape measure and then …

[Pocster]

[Chanmenie]

I do that, also with stanly knives 

[ProDave]

And pencils.

[joe90]

When I retired I had 10 tape measures, I hated not finding one and still have about 6 😎

[SteamyTea]

Same tape measure my Father had.

Not sure if he ever knew I had taken in, sometime in the 1970s.

 

[Pocster]

1 hour ago, Chanmenie said:

I do that, also with stanly knives 

Ah well ; I’ve got 1 fat max blade to hand as I’m paranoid about losing it . But I know I’ve got another 2 somewhere ….. 🙄

Currently only have 1 hammer - but must have at least 4 lost in the “ self build void of tool disappearance “ 

[LSB]

when I joined a company they had boxes of obsolete marketing material that they said to just chuck.

this included 5 boxes of 12 tape measures, so they all found there way to our bin (shed).

by the time we gave them to family, friends, visitors, postman and anyone that would take one I can't find one anywhere 😞

 

[Temp]

Tape measures are genetically related to socks.

[Blooda]

There is an alternative universe full of Screw Driver Bits.

[saveasteading]

37 minutes ago, Blooda said:

full of Screw Driver Bits.

i need of my missing bit holders. 'Borrowed' by dry-liners.

[saveasteading]

If you have only one tape, any errors are proportional and you may never know there is inaccuracy.

Stanley 30m tape measured 30.1 on a Silverline. Could have been very expensive.  So needed a 3rd tape to check.

TS agreed that I bin theirs.

 

I thus learnt that there are 3 rated levels of accuracy, and then silverline tapes.

[Onoff]

6 minutes ago, saveasteading said:

and then silverline tapes.

 

Don't they come with a lifetime guarantee, to be wrong forever?

[joe90]

2 hours ago, joe90 said:

When I retired I had 10 tape measures, I hated not finding one and still have about 6 😎

Actually all my tapes are the same make (fat max) so no errors 🤞

[Pocster]

This is why I measure everything incorrectly. Basically different brands of tape measures lie . The Makita one I got is the shitest for sure . Hell it’s not even the expected putrid blue 

Edited February 28, 2023 by pocster

[SteamyTea]

4 minutes ago, pocster said:

This is why I measure everything incorrectly

This is all you need, an app.

And lots of babies from different mothers.

 

https://www.calculator.net/height-calculator.html

[Pocster]

Todays hunt for dustpan and brush produced an entire family …

[ProDave]

When I go looking for something, I just stop looking when I have found the first one, I don't waste further time looking for their friends.

[saveasteading]

They are mostly built into the walls I suspect.

[Radian]

On 28/02/2023 at 13:20, SteamyTea said:

Same tape measure my Father had.

 

 

My Father gave me a load of tools he'd acquired during his time with the RAF in WWII. My favourite was a big adjustable spanner he said came from an on-board B-17 tool kit:

 

 

When I did a search I found both plane and spanner dated to 1935 so seems plausible.

[Pocster]

I didn’t look for multiple brushes and pans . They found me . I will look after them until they are old enough to fend for themselves 

Edited March 3, 2023 by pocster

[SimonD]

On 28/02/2023 at 15:08, saveasteading said:

silverline tapes

 

I have a couple of silverline's surveyor's tapes and I swear they stretch when pulling the tape straight.

[MikeSharp01]

On 28/02/2023 at 13:17, joe90 said:

When I retired I had 10 tape measures, I hated not finding one and still have about 6

I calculate that you have about 15 years worth of tapes to loose at that rate. Retired 10 years (Assumed) 4 tapes lost therefore 6 tapes left = 15 years worth of tapes  and I didn't have to ask Chat GPT.

[SteamyTea]

31 minutes ago, MikeSharp01 said:

I calculate that you have about 15 years worth of tapes to loose at that rate. Retired 10 years (Assumed) 4 tapes lost therefore 6 tapes left = 15 years worth of tapes  and I didn't have to ask Chat GPT.

I feel the icy hand of the ghost of SMP.

Try plugging some of those questions into ShatPEE.

 

Q; Two men are digging a 52 m tunnel from opposite ends, one digs at 10 m a day, the other at 6 m a day, what time does the cat put the kettle on?

[MikeSharp01]

13 hours ago, SteamyTea said:

SMP

Yes I was an SMP kid. I think I still have the 0 level text book somewhere.

[SteamyTea]

1 hour ago, MikeSharp01 said:

Yes I was an SMP kid. I think I still have the 0 level text book somewhere.

Drive a stake tough its heart.

Then bury cover down, under several tonnes of radioactive waste.

 

Never want to see one ever again.