Onoff

Shakespeare's didst.

Obscure glass could I presume be a latterly applied film?

Dead of night, white, tell 'em its bird sh!t: https://www.justpaintball.co.uk/

Poor cow, that'd be one either side.

I used dpc, stapled to the timbers, atop the support pads and just angled it a bit as necessary to shed sitting water.

TightVNC? https://www.tightvnc.com/

AnyDesk?

Or a complete new language, Pocsbian has a nice ring to it...

Not fair! First thing I thought of when I read the title and saw it was you.

You can buy handrail, baserail and spindle sections quite easily. For example: https://www.diy.com/departments/building-supplies/stairs-stair-parts/stair-parts/DIY830487.cat To bling up that centre post just route the edge, pin on some mouldings, a combo of both.

I'd be sticking a fake orange planning notice on the pole in the dead of night. New halfway house, traveller pitch etc.

I made mine but then I would...

No burning embers to contend with either, when your lying on the rug in front of it! 😉

Bet that kitchen is solid, Schreiber or something like that. All just clicked together with metal brackets.

With gaps such as above and the practice of "foam filling" afterwards, isn't there a danger of the foam bridging the ventilation void across the full width, between the rafter? I mean, you can't see how much it's expanding the other side. Is it an issue?