Help - SWMBO doesn't like it?

[Adsibob]

We had some digital renders done of our interior, not the whole house, but a few of the key spaces. SWMBO approved all of them (after quite a bit of debate about floor finishes and colour schemes).

A few months into the project, my architect (who has also been responsible for assisting with interior design and project management) mentioned to me that he had a second thought and he thought something would be improved if we made what, at the time, I thought was a relatively minor and inconsequential change (didn't impact floor finish or colour scheme, so I didn't think to trouble SWMBO with it). Fast forward a few months, SWMBO sees it, notes it's not the same as the digital render and says she hates it. I took it back to the architect and told him and he explained the design philosophy underpinning the change, refreshing my memory of the conversation we had about the change at the time. It makes perfect sense to me, which is why I approved the change in the first place. But now I'm stuck as SWMBO really wants to reverse about £1200 worth or work and materials, with the result that £1200 goes down the drain and then we spend another £300 or so changing it to how she was expecting it to be. 

[Pocster]

You by passed SWMBO - so you must pay ! 

[Adsibob]

1 minute ago, pocster said:

You by passed SWMBO - so you must pay ! 

The house will pay too. It won't look as good in my opinion.

[Pocster]

1 minute ago, Adsibob said:

The house will pay too. It won't look as good in my opinion.

Yes but you messed up . Lose 1.5k and learn your lesson .

We’ve all been there ?

[joe90]

I feel your pain but everything has to be agreed by both parties, perhaps you could both compromise on some middle ground?

[Pocster]

3 minutes ago, joe90 said:

I feel your pain but everything has to be agreed by both parties, perhaps you could both compromise on some middle ground?

No @joe90 ! You know there’s no compromise - no “ middle ground “ . He lost . He pays . He moves on to next situation where SWMBO isn’t informed .

Those are the rules ; cast in stone since man walked the Earth ! ( or until SWMBO changes them ) .

[JohnMo]

She is always right...  Been there, done that, got the t shirt

[Onoff]

Even if you have witnesses when you both agreed on the position of the new doorway, you will be in the wrong when it's done and she doesn't like it. Then you will have to move it.

 

Ask me how I know.

[Adsibob]

I'm trying to persuade her that she will learn to like it...

It's not going well.

[joe90]

Explain that £1500 will be deducted from “her” kitchen budget ?‍♂️.

[Pocster]

8 minutes ago, Adsibob said:

I'm trying to persuade her that she will learn to like it...

It's not going well.

A fools move . Get her to choose the curtains - then you are on a win 

[Pocster]

5 minutes ago, joe90 said:

Explain that £1500 will be deducted from “her” kitchen budget ?‍♂️.

Kitchen is man territory now ….

[redtop]

Just now, pocster said:

Kitchen is man territory now ….

I did sockets in wrong place. Should have known people would sit other side of the island. " couldn't you just add another couple of sockets'. This after plasterred and painted. 

[joe90]

4 minutes ago, pocster said:

Kitchen is man territory now ….

(I know that and you know that ?)

[ProDave]

We can't discuss this properly without details of WHAT changed?

 

I recall early on, a conversation with SWMBO went along the lines of "if I can't design the kitchen then YOU do ALL the cooking.

 

Case closed.

[Pocster]

@Adsibob needs to suck it up . No sympathy. He can only make it right by losing . Also as it’s Valentine’s Day may be on a promise …. ?

[Adsibob]

4 minutes ago, pocster said:

A fools move . Get her to choose the curtains - then you are on a win 

there are no curtains. Let me give some more details for context:

Version in digital render:

 

What we did (without consulting SWMBO):

 

 

 

 

 

[Pocster]

Just now, Adsibob said:

there are no curtains. Let me give some more details for context:

Version in digital render:

 

What we did (without consulting SWMBO):

 

 

 

 

 

Yes . SWMBO will stab you in your sleep tonight if you don’t conceded. You know what you must do . No renders will change that . No pandering from the forum will change that .

[ProDave]

Okay, go on, someone tell me WHAT changed between the render and the actual, because all I see is trivial detail changes.  I MUST be missing the obvious real change.

[Bonner]

Different light over the island?

[Adsibob]

7 minutes ago, ProDave said:

Okay, go on, someone tell me WHAT changed between the render and the actual, because all I see is trivial detail changes.  I MUST be missing the obvious real change.

In the render there is no tile above the sliding doors (that triangle shaped gable bit of wall). That is decorative plaster as is the sloped ceiling either side of the skylight.

In reality we took the tile up to the skylight on that wall. So quite dramatically different I guess. It's a rustic clay tile made in morocco and has come out a little more rustic than we were expecting, so she is annoyed there is more of it than we had originally planned.

[Iceverge]

Given that it's valentine's Day I think you had better get stuck in turning back the clock. 

 

Then like any proper married couple hold the fact against her for all time. 

[joe90]

27 minutes ago, pocster said:

Get her to choose the curtains - then you are on a win 

I did that but still ended up paying for them ?‍♂️

[joe90]

Can you not plaster over those tiles? @nod will know!

[Adsibob]

Just now, joe90 said:

Can you not plaster over those tiles? @nod will know!

We are using decorative clay plaster. It isn't painted, just left nude after a bit of polishing with a water atomiser and a cloth. So although it's more expensive than normal plaster, it saves a lot of money in not needing any painting. It is only meant to be applied 1mm to 1.5mm thick, directly onto plasterboard. My architect thinks we could plaster over the tiles but we would still get see the outline of each tile and the shape of the tile's surface (which is not smooth at all as these are unglazed zellige which are all wonky; each one is completely different to the other in terms of shape and overall dimension - part of their "rustic" charm).