ToughButterCup

Yes. The intention is to create about some 'reference' batons (4): perfectly vertical and level across the front of the wall (over about 10 m) The questions are What should the 'profile' (that protects the top of the cladding) be made of? (plastic / metal / lead?) and how far in front of the cladding should the cill / profile project? (10mm / 20mm / doesn't matter ?) Ian

Early in the build, before I became a nasty, snarling cynical bastard of a self-builder, I allowed the people who worked for us to get away with very unprofessional work. This episode (the first of a good few, I suspect) is about how to cope with a wall whose vertical and lateral profiles bear more than a passing resemblance to a banana. Everyone winces when I point it out. Everyone. Even that polite Mr @Stones when he dropped in (for a laugh) Can't take a joke? Shouldn'a started then should I. Here's the picture: Its our front wall; capped off with some Evalon V and a capping strip. Here's a diagram - a vertical profile. As you see from the picture, we have yet to clad our front wall. The drawing is a first stab at what to do. The problem is simple. The wall is so 'bent' that any cladding fitted closely to the wall at the bottom would end up 'overshooting' the capping strip at the top of the wall. So I propose to fit a window cill (- like) piece of wood at the top of the wall but under the bottom of the capping, and to protect that 'cill' with some form of metal or plastic profile. The end in mind is to create some wriggle room in which to compensate for the sloppy wall construction. The red line in the drawing is the intended metal or plastic profile. Is my design proposal sensible? If so, what type of profile should I use?

Thanks for the explanation. When did those regulations change?

Pheeeewww. That was close.

But, but , buuut you're a woman!?

Meat. Eat a huge hunk of ham. See what doesnt happen. Oh, and by the way, eat just a small amount of corn on the cob at the same time. (Used as a transit marker).

Pretty vents don't exist @vivienz. Its a new job for Supa @Onoff : add it to the list. For delivery 2025.....

Thats almost exactly what we did. Some cutting (but more infill) was needed because of the size of the Durisol block: it projected just a little too far in places. We also needed to match the pitch of one section of the building with (in this case) some external steels. Needless to say, with my luck, the two pitches did not match. Matching the two might not be important to you (the image appears to show two different pitches).

measuring ... thats why I didnt use them

Super cheap, super easy: thick bubble wrap, and a roller. Conserves heat quite well too. Lots of suppliers.

And a talent (on my job) for making 400mm errors.

Not sure that the core price varies that much (Lancashire), but transport cost do. And thats what makes the difference. Our 3 POSI quotes were within a couple of hundred: one company was happy to take responsibility for the measuements (which weren't that accurate).

And how often has Patience ( @Onoff's long-suffering wife) heard that?

Scene : local pub, Friday evening . Bar is full - buzzing chit chat , barmaid has a big grin on her face - all's well with the world. OnOff's mate: How's it goin' son? Mine's a pint. OnOff : Get on wiv ya, 's your round I think you'll find, matey boy OnOffs mate: Whatcha bin doin this week any way? OnOff: Yer....gorra special job on like, ................. (pauses for effect) .......... bin makin' a church pew The whole bar stops dead. All eyes on OnOff. Barmaid's spilling beer down her blouse with shock, beer's being snorted through a few noses, the pub dog's dreams come true - everyone spills their crisps at the same time. The pub parrot suffers spontaneous lock-jaw, and craps noisily with shock OnOffs mate: Seen the light eh, pal? OnOff: Naaaaah, but I like a challenge. And ( nods at the barmaid) wet T shirt competitions.

Use your own written style. Always. Cant you see the reader's eyes rolling ? In the context of a simple NMA application, who gives a stuff about the vision thing ?

And look at all your success despite - maybe because of - that.

I got so fed up with the kids ' ... needing to store ... ' ( or simply plonking rubbish in there without telling us) at our place that I created a section in our storage area called Death Row. If it was still in there after six months , I sent the offender a text. Still there after a further six months - skipped. Not one of them has ever complained - they dont need their A Level notes any more.... funny that innit?

We're starting to clear out our cottage in preparation for the move up the garden path into Great Crested Newt Towers (Salamander Cottage) And that means endless trips to the tip, books to Oxfam, long-forgotten stuff cooed over and then thrown away. And, given our age, the first step in the gentle process of Death Cleaning . The last thing we want to bequeath our kids is a few weeks hard, unpleasant work. So we need storage boxes. We still need to to pack away thousands of bits and pieces. Where does it all come from? I think I must have spent a week searching for a plastic storage box 'system' : stackable, fairly robust, and sensibly priced. I think the searching is making me go cross-eyed . Anyone got a recommendation?

Aaah tell thee lad, aahve sin sum stooof up at 'is place as 'd mek yer ears droop wi' jealousy. Sum on it, well ..... it'd tek thee breath. (tr. kill you)

I'm knackered enough to wince at the word barrow, & now the quack tells me I have an arthritic shoulder : but thanks for the thought. A couple of years ago, I bumped into a local who makes concrete like this .... one of the most interesting guys I have ever talked to: cheerful as a Lottery Winner. Top bloke - for a self builder. I can feel a little visit coming on. If you've driven past Lancaster on the M6, you driven past his 'yard' 50 meters from it in fact.

Here they are. Important lesson (for me anyway): cheap IBCs need an expensive boudoire in which to keep them. And that's a shame. The idea of waterharvesting attracts. Time to hunt for some cheap (how to put this? ) surplus concrete: a bin end if you like.

Good point. Hadn't thought of that. When people walk in to our place, they automatically look up - because there is a large window for people to look through. Thats the difference

No. The effect you talk about - drawing your eye upward - is exactly why we have had our landing designed as you suggest.

You need; persistence optimism bias humour guts The rest is easy.

Cofra : I'm hooked on them. Orchilla. Light, flexible, comfortable. 2nd pair in four years: worn for at least 300 days a year. Available for £50 (here) or £150 (here). You couldn't make it up couldja?