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Making a *love* bench


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That's what he said!

Mate wants me to make a Valentine's gift for his squeeze...a love bench...FFS!

He has two nice seasoned half tree trunks to work with and has an unreasonable expectation that because I've a chainsaw, I'm some sort of artist. But hey ho, I'm there tomorrow morning and going to try something...help!

Attached pic shows the rough plan, any suggestions?

IMAG0506.jpg

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Australian plans I see :ph34r: (picture is upside down for those that don't have a posh computer that auto rotates)

 

I made a garden seat like that, just because someone gave me a log already sawn down the middle.  I just hammered 4 posts into the ground and sat it on them.
 

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36 minutes ago, ProDave said:

  I just hammered 4 posts into the ground and sat it on them.

 

Dave, come on now...

It's a Love bench, and there's you talking all hammering posts and all...tut tut

He wants to sit looking at the flowers and reading poetry. And, maybe move it now and then??

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Have you warned him about splinters?

 

My suggestion would be a kissing bench for a Valentine, which is two chairs orientated opposite ways, so that they can only kiss.

 

Then hampered and restricted passion may lead to a bubbling over later.

 

 Just make sure you do not have a left and right handed kisser.

 

Edited by Ferdinand
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Hmm specification seems rather vague. Does he want a love seat - sitting  offset side by side looking in opposite directions - its all about eye contact, a seat he can love, a seat he can make love on / around / over or none of the above or all of the above. 

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He said a rustic bench for the garden to give as a Valentine's/anniversary present. Both aren't keen on consumerism and like to make/ recycle everything hey can...

It's a bit rough but he very happy?

IMAG0510.thumb.jpg.33b2c846d7cd8946360fe21a5f41493f.jpg

Also rattled together some vegetable beds from old scaffolding boards.

IMAG0507.thumb.jpg.5c9fe0d4aa3d8ee18416289b60731d95.jpg

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They had some love swing contraptions when I went to the Erotica exhibition once.....

 

Quite funny to a see posh Yuppie bird spreadeagled trying them out in her business suit, "Oh Tarquin I think we should get this one but with the Connolly hide!;)

 

I like a scaffold board, did the front sliding gate in them. Turned them into T&G with 6mm ply tongues:

 

SAM_8442

 

Down near me they're:

 

3,9m - £10 pounds per one (£8.70 second hand)
3m - £9 pounds per one 
2,4m - £8.50 pounds per one

 

Wonder how the price varies across the country?

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15 hours ago, Onoff said:

They had some love swing contraptions when I went to the Erotica exhibition once.....

 

Quite funny to a see posh Yuppie bird spreadeagled trying them out in her business suit, "Oh Tarquin I think we should get this one but with the Connolly hide!;)

 

 

A school friend's first car was a Morris Minor, when we we still in the sixth form.  He was the first of us to get a car, most of the rest of us were still riding motorcycles back then.  One of the first modifications he did was fit some straps, like the old hoops hanging from the roof of tube trains for standing passengers, under the dash and make up a knee cushion that fitted neatly into the passenger side foot well................................

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8 minutes ago, jack said:

 

A "friend's"? 9_9

 

 

Well, the sort of friend who would, if adequately rewarded, lend you his car so that you could take a girlfriend out with the wild hope that you'd get a chance to make use of the ankle hoops and floor cushion with her................

 

(never happened on the couple of occasions I borrowed his car!)

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"There were stain marks on the cushion where someone'd been a pushin', and footprints on the windscreen upside down"

 

xD

 

I had one of the older engineers come into our design office years ago, stand in the middle of the room and recite that. It was a while later I realised he was referring to my Capri in the car park where said foot prints were all too obvious.

 

 

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55 minutes ago, JSHarris said:

Well, the sort of friend who would, if adequately rewarded, lend you his car so that you could take a girlfriend out with the wild hope that you'd get a chance to make use of the ankle hoops and floor cushion with her................

 

 

Oh I got what the hoops etc were for.  My question was whether it was really a friend who owned it... :ph34r:

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2 hours ago, jack said:

 

Oh I got what the hoops etc were for.  My question was whether it was really a friend who owned it... :ph34r:

 

Sadly, yes...........  All I could afford at the time was a 1959 Triumph T110, with an open sidecar, that, IIRC, I bought for £25.  I did add Bonneville barrels, pistons, head and twin Amal carbs to it, though, so it was near-enough a Bonneville in terms of power.   Sadly, the sidecar was not really as big a "pull" as owning a "proper" car.................

 

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11 hours ago, JSHarris said:

 

Sadly, yes...........  All I could afford at the time was a 1959 Triumph T110, with an open sidecar, that, IIRC, I bought for £25.  I did add Bonneville barrels, pistons, head and twin Amal carbs to it, though, so it was near-enough a Bonneville in terms of power.   Sadly, the sidecar was not really as big a "pull" as owning a "proper" car.................

 

I never had a car,

Had a bike, and a few vans,

Always had a bike though when I was younger,

Anyway, I digress, my brother borrowed my van one day to move some stuff or something, so I had his car to work, picked the then GF up in it when she finished work, on the way home she said,

"I know you need the van for work, but   why don't you get a car instead of that stupid bike,?"

I stopped the car, and put my ex-GF out, she was only about 15mile from home.

 

 

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