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Stand back and stand by. Nuvver fine mess.


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I blame the geology. That's wot didit. And too powerful a digger. Oh, and my stupidity - a bit. 

 

BOBCAT digga on hire. Beautiful proportional controls. Smooooove, fast, slow, millimeter precision,  spacious. Hear the warning bells yet?

 

Final foul drains to be dug. Easy peasy lemon squeezee. Dunnit before - by hand as well as machine. Whaddya want? Depth, accuracy correct width. Oh how long it took for me to learn that the hard way. How very steep was that learning curve.

 

Up to now I've only dug through glacial till. And garden soil. This dig was to be different. Mudstone and sandstone. Yuk. The type of boulders where the bucket teeth leave smoking grooves on the rock faces. Time after time. Suitcase size boulders one after the other. Some obviously had received the tender ministrations of a glacier. Nuvver peel of the warning bells? 

 

But I'm 'ard: tough as a buttercup. Nuffin stops me.  I get everywhere. But even I have to admit defeat occasionally.  Solid wall of rock.  Hmm? BCO:  mind if I put the I/C here because...? Tickety boo.

 

Backfill time.  Yo! Easy. 

Edited by ToughButterCup
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Dose of pancreas-damaging sugar (Luke o' Zade) and I'm on fire. Swinging like a goodun. (Shadddup at the back there..... specially you Russ.)

 

Inspection chambers standing up like soldiers, swiftly disappeared in their cloak of MOT 1 and earth. Boulders hidden underground again.  Except a few. ( Ding, dong) 

 

I bet we'll drive over these I/Cs and smash them to bits.... I know!  Protect them pro tem with...... BOULDERS. Yo Sushi.! Great idea.

 

There was one boulder - my favourite- beautiful,  round, beautifully round, colour of Trump's coiffure, but with more emotional and actual intelligence : a cracker. (Bells any louder yet ?)

 

Scooped up and gently,  elegantly dropped (key word)  in place. 

 

This next bit is where my life slowed to a crawl. A second became an hour.  

 

Impact.

Exactly where I wanted it. And started to roll......  F...U...C...K. NOOOOOOO.

straight onto the I/C lid. Which promptly swiveled on its axis . Boulder disappeared. 

It was only the fear of losing whats left of my wedding tackle on the track controls that stopped me flying out of the digger front window to catch the boulder before it disappeared down the I/C. 

 

Disbelief. Sheer disbelief. 

I need a break..... sweating at the memory. Worse, much worse follows.

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out of the cab like a pocket rocket,  IC cover off.

 

There it sits. Grinning. Look at me! Aren't I clever? A perfect fit almost.

Reach in, try to lift it. Hernia warns against anything more strenuous.  BuggerAndDoubleBugger.

 

Reach down into the hole, three tonne strop and a couple of shackles round the boulder, hook up to the bucket.

And lift. (By now the bells are ringing loudly even for me...)

 

POP. ...it actually sounded like that.

 

Out it all comes boulder, IC riser and all. And of course all the surrounding soil rushes in and fills the IC base and pipe. DAMN_BLOODY_NATION.

 

They say nature abhors a vacuum.  

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I love the way you tell them Ian.

 

I am very familiar with glacial boulders, loads of them in the ground here, this was the biggest one I dug out doing the foundations.

 

big_rock.thumb.jpg.1a25082461012411b9476f5474a1e9c8.jpg

 

Some got used shoring up parts of the bank of the burn, the smaller ones just got re buried. that big one remains as a corner stone by the drive.

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50 minutes ago, ProDave said:

I love the way you tell them Ian.

 

I am very familiar with glacial boulders, loads of them in the ground here, this was the biggest one I dug out doing the foundations.

 

big_rock.thumb.jpg.1a25082461012411b9476f5474a1e9c8.jpg

 

Some got used shoring up parts of the bank of the burn, the smaller ones just got re buried. that big one remains as a corner stone by the drive.

 

I could do with a boulder like that on the edge of my driveway to stop the F-in-L driving over the shrubs as he attempts a 63-point turn each time they visit.

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1 hour ago, ProDave said:

I love the way you tell them Ian.

 

I am very familiar with glacial boulders, loads of them in the ground here, this was the biggest one I dug out doing the foundations.

 

big_rock.thumb.jpg.1a25082461012411b9476f5474a1e9c8.jpg

 

Some got used shoring up parts of the bank of the burn, the smaller ones just got re buried. that big one remains as a corner stone by the drive.

That is a cracker. As far as boulders go it looks pretty nice.....weird that isn't it. 

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13 minutes ago, SuperJohnG said:

That is a cracker. As far as boulders go it looks pretty nice.....weird that isn't it. 

I could take you up the road and show you one that's about 4ft out of the ground and must be 10ft by 6ft. The farmer has made no attempt to move it. The field fence goes up and over the top and down the other side.

 

 

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